Why is it so difficult to change?

Ever want to make a change and failed? I think this research abstract below goes a long way towards explaining one very powerful factor for why we stay the same even though we know we could be better.

In a recent paper, Whiten & van Schaik (2007, Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society of London, Series B, 362, 603–620) suggested that although a tendency to conform to the behaviour of others is widespread in animals, only chimpanzees and humans will ignore personally acquired knowledge of a superior behavioural alternative and copy the behaviour of others expressing a less effective behaviour. Here we show that ‘observer’ Norway rats, Rattus norvegicus, that have learned either that one food is toxic and another safe or that one food tastes good and another is less palatable will ignore their personal experience and choose to eat an unpalatable or presumably toxic food after interacting with ‘demonstrator’ rats that have eaten that food. Such observer rats will eat as much unpalatable or presumably toxic food after interacting with demonstrator rats that have eaten them as they would if they had no personal experience of superior alternatives. We discuss the similarity of rats' total reliance on socially acquired information when in possession of conflicting personal information to ‘conformity’ in chimpanzees and humans. http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6W9W-4SB9F03-2...

Reading this, it seems to me that the only way to overcome this powerful near-hardwired need to conform seems to be either

  • strict isolation
  • reliance on a counter-culture of like minded friends

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In Buddhism, as a vehicle for profound inner change, these two remedies are recognized as meditation retreat and refuge in the spiritual community, particularly the company of those well realized.

This reminds me of the autobiography of Thich Nhat Hanh "Fragrant Palm Leaves", where he speaks of a difficult period when he underwent substantial and challenging inner change in retreat. Just afterwards he found it very very difficult to be around his old friends who unknowingly and constantly tried to drag him back into his old patterns through their habituated expectations and projections. This is a somewhat different form of peer influence, affecting an inner attitude or self concept rather than a physical behavior. Thich Nhat Hanh found he had to shun his old friends for many months until his hard-won inner change in retreat had stabilized.